Simonne Walmsley tries shopping with a Personal Stylist, after facing that dark corner of shame in our wardrobes where all impulse buys live…
For the last five years, I’ve been really busy. I’ve redecorated and renovated, twice, sold my home, twice, moved from Auckland to Wellington and then a year and a half later, from Wellington to the Kapiti Coast, had two children and continued to work through most of it all. I started in the city, working in an office, and have finished at the beach, working at home half hanging out the bi-fold door by my desk, onto the deck. Funnily enough, nothing reflects the changes in my life more clearly than my wardrobe (except maybe a whole bunch of, um, laugh lines). I realised this when recent crazy weather found me standing in my wardrobe digging out my favourite merino beanie (yes, in February) and taking stock of the sum of all things, which turned out to be the single thought, You are so confused. These clothes make no sense. And they really don’t.
We all have that dark corner of shame in our wardrobe, where all-wrong impulse buys and bad decisions go to hide. And then, for the really bad decisions, that box in the deep depths of that dark corner of shame which you hope never sees light again. I know it, and you know it. Sometimes the corner and box are bigger than others, but my confession here is, I think my entire wardrobe has become that dark corner of shame that needs to go in that box in the deep depths. Oh dear. And oops. My bad.
It’s not the clothes’ fault. They’re excellent clothes. It just turns out that I’m a really bad shopper. My saviour over the last few years has been online shopping. I considered myself a fairly well seasoned shopper (my credit card wouldn’t argue, nor would my husband who is alarmingly capable of identifying new items. The old, This? I’ve had this for ages! does not work in my house), so if you’d asked me a couple of weeks ago I would have said, It’s brilliant! Can’t live without it! All hail online shopping! Now, I’m not so confident. But don’t get me wrong, the ability to shop online is a beautiful thing. I’m a huge (huge!) fan of ordering a new cardy over my cuppa and toast at 6.30am. But, for me, it’s also a super-trap because it’s become the only way I shop, and I refer you to my earlier statement that I’m actually really bad at it.
My style has always been that of an I-want-pants-show-me-pants-quick-with-the-pants-why-are-you-bringing-me-tops-and-shoes-with-the-pants? kind of shopper. My black cardy is worn to death, so I buy a new black cardy, preferably identical (I think this is my second mention of cardies. I’m a big fan of cardies). The shop assistant has gorgeous hair, so obviously I should buy everything she is wearing because that will fix my own curly disaster immediately. I’m also inclined to see something amazing on someone else, obsess over it until I can’t live without it a day longer, and become totally blind to all of the myriad of reasons why this piece (or pieces, forgive me!) is actually going to be sold-on, gifted, or snuck into a bag for the clothing bin, barely worn if at all, because I have disastrous habits. It’s hardly a wonder that my wardrobe is in a mess and I’ve never quite found my fit.
After pouring over footage and pictures coming out of New York Fashion Week which has just passed (see our review on Thread) (Karen Walker, I have hairstyle envy. I’m going to need to replicate your outfit.) I was really in the mood to be open minded, to re-evaluate and collect. Fortuitously on the collection front, there are lots of new ones releasing into stores all over New Zealand right now and I’d narrowed my coat search down to taylor boutique where there are definitely lots of new pieces to adore. (Read Simonne’s search for the perfect coat here on Thread).
A coat isn’t something I’d buy online, so I phoned taylor boutique’s Wellington manager, Laura, to call dibs on the coat until I could get in-store, at which time she suggested I have a styling session while I was there. And so, last week, I had my first ever styling session and realised not only that I’ve been doing shopping all wrong but I’m fairly sure I’ve been doing it all wrong the entire time. I mean, since the shopper in me awoke back in the very beginning. Ugh.
What I learned is that I’m still not very good (read: awful) at working out what looks good on me (that was a bit humbling). I’m judgemental of my shape, dismissive of amazing clothes that I can and should be wearing, just by not thinking enough, and I actually need someone at this stage to tell me what I need to do with my clothes to get the best out of them. I can’t believe I’ve never embraced being styled sooner. It’s also given me pause to think about the way I buy, what I buy, and also where I spend. At least I’m not the only one, as I’m sure I’ve observed that demand in New Zealand in recent years for personal shoppers and stylists has been growing.
Online, unless it’s a tried and true wardrobe staple, I’m generally buying something because it looks good on a model in a picture, so not an accurate idea of how something will look on me, obviously (well, “obviously”, now), or making assumptions about myself, my shape, what will or won’t suit me and what I might be able to do with a piece. Bad move. During my styling session, although I’d been dreaming of a knitwear piece in ivory (it’s what I would have bought online), I chose it in delta, a soft greyish blue that I have to admit did far more for me than ivory, despite being a slight step outside my colour comfort zone. For most of the time that it hung in my changing room though, I was edging towards leaving it altogether because I thought it was wrong for what I was looking for, as though it really just wanted to hang on the couch with a pair of jeans. But then in a fit of embracing the styling and new good habits, I tried it again, first with a skirt, then tights, then super long pants, different textured pants and different shoes. It looked completely different.
My goal now is to try and get a season ahead of myself and shop this way more as my rule, rather than my exception (as in, save up so I can buy a seasonal capsule of new pieces that I can be sure work). It really felt like such a treat, taking that time, loading my changing room to the gunnels with a much wider range of options than I’d intended. And realising that it’s ok to try on boots say, even if I have no intention of buying them, because they help me see how they change the look of a pair of pants. Sometimes trying to picture it just doesn’t work, and as my reward, because I took the time to just give so many pieces a go in-store, to try heels, boots, flats, long pants, cropped pants and layers on layers, a pair of pants I’d seen online many times, but didn’t want to try or buy for so many (invalid) reasons, will be a key piece in my winter wardrobe.
The stylists are there to help, and they want to make sure you make the right decisions. It’s what they do because it’s what they love, and sometimes, we just need the help.
I went into my styling session interested in three pieces. I was hoping to walk out with those three. I ended up buying a five piece capsule start to my new wardrobe, and only one of those pieces was one I had expected to buy (The Winter Coat! Ha! I have my Winter Coat!) My lesson learned – take the time to play and be willing to let someone else guide you within your own personal style, and also, sometimes, do take that risk. I guarantee you’ll make less mistakes.
Words and photos, Simonne Walmsley
5 March 2014
Leave a Reply